HypnoBirthing® UK

Hi
I had a beautiful baby girl in january after reading hypnobirthing books and using CDs. there are a couple of things that i keep thinking over and wondered if anyone on here would be able to give me answers. I arrived at the hospital 5-6cm dilated, the midwives couldnt believe how calm i was, managed another hour without pain relief which i put down to the hypnobirthing practice. i used gas and air for a while then had pethedine towards the end as i was falling asleep between contractions and not having G+A in time. i remember the midwife saying i could start pushing if i wanted but i had no urge at all. i knew when the contractions were starting but they only seemed to last a few seconds and i sort of alternated birth breathing with pushing. Everyone said they could see the head and i thought i should be able to feel it but couldnt. the midwife wanted to hurry things up as there had been myconium in the water, my baby's heart rate kept dropping very low and 2nd stage had taken 2 hours. i tried pushing but couldn't really co-ordinate everything so nothing happened so it was decided that they would use ventouse. i was confindent that if everyone left me alone i could just lie on the bed and the baby would come out on her own, when she was ready but it seemed to be quite urgent that she was born straight away.

although i dont think i could have changed any of what happened what keeps going around my head is

1. why didnt i have any urge to push - was it the pethedine, hypnobirthing or were we just not ready?
2. would my baby really have just come out in her own time or was that just wishful thinking?

thank you for reading
bec x

Hi bec

Firstly I'd like to congratulate you on your lovely baby and to stress that you did really, really well - especially as you 'only' read the book and didn't attend classes.

Pethidine is known to cause drowsiness and confusion in labour so I guess it might have affected your urge to bear down as you might have not have been getting the signals your body was sending you - or it could just be that your NER (natural expulsive reflex) was taking its time to 'kick in' and normally that would have been ok. However as your baby had passed meconium in the uterus, and this can be a sign of foetal distress, the medical staff will have wanted her delivered as soon as possible, to ensure her safety. Of course the baby would have come out in her own time, but in your circumstances safety became the over-riding concern.

I hope you can now put the 'what if's' behind you and enjoy your lovely little girl If you find that these thoughts just keep whirling around in your brain you might like to try a little exercise that I have advised my reiki and hypnotherapy clients to try. You write down your experience with any regrets, disappointments or guilt you may be feeling on a piece of paper and then you burn it - and as you watch the smoke you imagine it carrying away all of the negative thoughts that you have been experiencing. You have absolutely nothing to reproach yourself for!

Hope this helps.

Kaz xx

Hi Bec,
sometimes there is no desire to push at all . its not like everyone has that feeling .its probably related to your daughters positioning too , meaning she wasnt quite low enough yet for you to get that expulsive feeling .
pethidine affects your perspective and your memory as you have described too ,so you may have overridden any pushy type feelings as you were under the effects of pethidine .
she probably would have come out in her own time , but the circumstances overtook her ! i would recommend cranio sacral therapy as a way to come to turns with your birth and for your daughter to continue her birth as if she was doing it herself , in this way you can both move on together .
Eleanor

thank you both for your replies- its such a relief to have someone elses opinion. i know it was the best possible outcome and i will try both of your suggestions.

x