HypnoBirthing® UK

[Smurk]

Hello

I am new here and I am very new to hypnobirthing. I had two c-sections previously : 1/ emergency one (pre-eclampsia) and 2/failure to progress, tired and not prepared enough. So I am planning a VBA2C (22 week pregnant now). I don't live in UK, I hope it's not a problem but I couldn't find a strong hypnobirthing community in the country where I live, so I thought you could help me here... (?)

So I am fine with my VBA2C preparation and fine with my hypnobirthing preparation. I just can't exactly work out both together... :p
I should give birth in a public hospital (which I know very well and I like them), and I have a private obstetrician because someone had to "support" my VBA2C project. I can talk quite freely with him, and I think I like him, each time I see him I can discuss everything I want, and I already know his thoughts and he knows mine, and I hope there won't be any surprise on the D day.

A few questions, still...

1/ My husband has never been really involved in our children's births. As he says, he is happy for the pregnancy etc, at some point there is a baby and that's all, he doesn't want to be much more involved in between. So I won't try to convince him to do hypnobirthing classes with me, but I would like to give him clues and things that he could do when in labour, so he can be involved if he wants. And I don't want to hire a doula, because - as I know him - I would feel like I am taking away his little chance to be involved in the birth. Do you think it's realistic to plan to use hypnobirthing for that birth without having someone 100% hypnobirthing-aware all the time with me? I feel like I could do it, I am just not sure how realistic it is. What do you think?

2/ For a VBA2C here, there are a few things "required" (or so). I mean, I could say no to them, but if I say no too often I will lose my obstetrician's support and I am not sure the outcome would be better for me. For instance, we have discussed about continuous monitoring. First I said no and I told him that I would need to be mobile (and he said yes I could move around with continuous monitoring), then I said I may want to take a bath or a shower (and he said yes I could do that with continuous monitoring), and then I said what's the point if there is no-one around to check the monitoring (and he said that for a VBA2C there should always be someone around to check on the monitoring). So, I had these three reasons for no continuous monitoring, and he always gave me satisfying answers. Do you think it's OK if I go with that continuous monitoring under these conditions?

3/ He will certainly want to perform regular vaginal exams, he told me that I will be expected to progress regularly (he is concerned with my previous failure to progress). Same thing as above... Should I say OK if that's his guarantee that he will let me try the VBAC? Should I really fight against it (which I could -- but then how supportive will he be) ?

4/ A VBAC shouldn't be induced. He said that if baby is too late (we have to discuss how late he means) we will consider a c-section but not an induction. I know induction is not good, but then... I don't know, if that's the only way to have a vaginal birth...? How late do you think baby could be?

Many thanks for your help!

[mia]

Hi Smurk,

These are very technical questions, and I think, to be honest, most hypnobirthing practitioners are not in the position of being able to give obstetric and midwifery advice. In fact, we are, quite rightly, discouraged from doing so. Hypnobirthing will help you, whatever desicions you take, and no matter how medicalised you decide to get. You might want to seek out advice from independent midwives, or NCT antenatal teachers, AIMS advisors. There might also be some hypnobirthing practitioners who would be happy to advise you on a one to one basis, depending on their level of expertise around birthing issues. Basically, the more intervention you accept, the more challenges your mind and body would have to face (increasing your chances of "failure to progress" by reducing your oxytocin levels). But hypnobirthing will balance that out for you hopefully, and help your body do what nature intended it to do. In my opinion, you're doing the right thing to be thinking these things through carefully, and making these decisions yours - not some-one else's. Good luck with it!

[soshanna_hayhoe]

Hi Smurk

I just wanted to reassure you with regards to your husband. My husband was not very supportive and didn't really even know what HypnoBirthing was by the time I gave birth. I didn't expect him to do anything but just be there (and fill the pool, talk photos and video the birth) . I went on to have an amazing birth which was a wonderful bonding experience for us. And he was perfect at his roles

Take care and happy birthing
Soshanna